My family is a traditional Chinese family with both my parents being atheists and communists. Although I was not a diehard atheist I was taught to be wary of religions. When I was in secondary school, my political class teacher asked us, “what’s your religion?” We answered, “we have no religion.” She smiled and said firmly, “Remember communism is your religion.” This left a lasting impression in me.
The first christian I met was a student, a senior in my university. She tried to share her faith with me. Her approach was direct: ‘Do you wish to know more about Christianity?’ She ask me to join her meetings. I accepted because I was very curious about Christians and I wanted to show my respect to her. But I could not accept her Christian ideas. I used evolution theory to argue against her human origin issue. When she could not out argue me it gave me a sense of victory. I even ask her provocatively, “ if I will not accept God no matter what you do, how would you feel?” She answered me calmly in a tone I never expected, “ I never think I can convince you or expect you to accept God so quickly. I just plant a seed in your heart. God will use it to remind you in His own time.” I was touched by her answer. However I chose not to have anything more to do with her.
The world of work
After graduation. I worked in a government owned corporation. The political atmosphere made me avoid any contact with those whom I suspect to be Christians. I regarded them as queer & misfits. In our working environment, everyone was ambitious. Conflicts between colleagues abounded with each trying to outdo one another by ruthless manipulation and back stabbing. I desired to get promoted so I left work and went back to university to get a master degree. There I had time to think about my job and my life. I felt so oppressed and depressed! I despaired of being able to do anything to change the world. I saw that my romantic desire to better the society with my acquired university knowledge was fading away. There were so many problems in the society and in politics, that I knew if I wanted to be promoted, I would have to do many things that I never want to, things that I knew were wrong. Even though I had a well-paid easy job, I was depressed and frustrated. I was living in such a complicated net of relationships, it made me more and more numb, more and more confused. I began to fear that I was beginning to be like my peers, eager to get more power and more money. I knew I would eventually become a person that I would hate. As a result, I decided to go abroad. I just wanted to live a clean and simple life while I still have the means to do so as at this time my parents could live without my support.
To prepare for my oversea trip I started to learn English. In my English class I met an English tutor. I appreciated him. He is a good man, competent and logical, so I tried to make friends with him. Later, I found out he was a Christian. Slowly, he started to share his beliefs with me. He did better than the university mate and answered satisfactorily with carefully reasoned answers to my many questions. Just before I left China, we talked late into the night. He told me he had been praying for me every day since we met, that God would lead me every day. It was the first time I discovered I was so important to him. I was very moved.
He said he will help me to contact a church in Perth but I did not hear from him for nearly a year. But somehow I happened to go to a church. The church life I experienced here had a huge influence on me. Firstly, the bible study here gives me a brand new knowledge about christianity, answering a lot of my questions. Secondly, the church folks showed me the meaning of love. At the beginning, I was not so used to the care that they showed me. Slowly, I found they really did not have any other motives, just pure love. They gave love naturally, honestly, not for appearance. I saw that Christianity was able to achieve far more than what communism promised. The most significant thing that happened to me is I have found peace in my heart. I couldn’t get this peace before, even though I didn’t lack anything. I have been wanting to find this path to an inside peace which has eluded me for so long. One day I watched a Christian film called “War Room”. It occurred to me that if every Christian prayed like what the film portrayed, how powerful this Christian religion will be! I couldn’t sleep that night. The next morning I was gazing outside. Suddenly I felt so peaceful! The feeling is hard to describe but it was really strong and clear. A song sounded in my ears – “The sun above clouds”. At that moment, I had just one thought: I want to believe God! I want to! Instantly my heart was flooded with an indescribable peaceful sensation. I knew I have finally found my peace.
After I made my decision to believe God I decided to be baptized on 6th December 2015. Surprisingly a friend who was troubled by many doubts about God was also baptized on the same day. I now understand God reveals Himself to different people in different ways. He is a mighty God who changes the impossible to possible. I know my God is real and gives everyone the peace which He has given me.
Sheng is doing a diploma of Business Management in Perth