A Time to Laugh September 2017

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  In A Long Island Shop:

Guitar, for sale…. Cheap………. no strings attached.

  In Hospital Waiting Room:

Smoking Helps You Lose Weight … One Lung At A Time!


Sales Conference.

Therapy Session.

On a bulletin board attendee posted:

Success Is Relative. The more The Success, The more The Relatives.

  Attendee shares…

I Read About The Evils Of Drinking this week… So that very hour I Gave Up Reading.


Getting Older.

Changes of Life.

My Grandfather Is Eighty! 

Still Doesn’t Need Glasses…. He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.

You Know Your kids Have Grown Up:

When Your Daughter Begins To Put On Lipstick or when your Son starts To wipe It Off.


Business Signs…

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 Sign In A Bar:

Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget… Please do Pay In Advance.

 Sign In Driving School:

If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive… Don’t Stand In Her Way.


Men!…

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 Behind Every Great Man:

There Is A… Surprised Woman.

 The Reason Men Lie Is Because:

Women… Ask too Many Questions.


The Truth is Out…

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 Laugh And The World Laughs With You:

Snore And… You sleep Alone.

 The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe:

Is The Fact… That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.


Catch the customers…

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 Sign At A Barber’s Saloon in Detroit :

We Need Your Heads… To Run Our Business.

 Environmental Sign In A Restaurant:

All Drinking Water In This Establishment… Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.


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