by Chua Wee Hian
After a hard day’s work, the old farmer would retire to the huge pond at the back of his house. It was a time of peace and enjoyment. One evening, he went there, and to his surprise, heard voices shouting and laughing. As he went closer, he saw a group of naked ladies swimming in his pond. He made his presence known and the ladies all swam to the deep end. They yelled at him, “We are not coming out until you leave.”
The old farmer replied, “I didn’t come here to watch you ladies swim and make you get out naked. I only came here to feed the alligator.”
When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife. Prince Philip
The reason that so many of us cannot save money is because of our friends. They’re always buying things we cannot afford. Sam Ewing
Tonight, I have the grand privilege of introducing my manager. He is without a shadow of doubt the greatest manager. That’s not only my opinion but his also.
Tonight, I’m not going to bore you with a long rambling speech. But I’m going to introduce you to the man who will.
Our next speaker is a very active church member. He squirms, wiggles and fidgets when the sermon goes beyond 30 minutes.
There is one major rule in public speaking. After a flattering introduction, please don’t tell the audience you don’t deserve it. They’ll find out soon enough!