A Pastor was in his pulpit and he apologized for the band-aid on his face. “I was thinking of my sermon whilst shaving and cut my face.” After the service, the Treasurer found a note in the collection plate. “Next time think about your face and cut the sermon.”
The pastor preached on COMMITMENT.
The organist played, I WILL NOT BE MOVED
The pastor preached on TITHING.
The organist played, JESUS PAID IT ALL
The pastor preached I WILL SOON RESIGN
Organist played, WHY NOT TONIGHT?
The pastor preached MY FAREWELL SERMON
The organist played WHAT A FRIEND WE HAVE IN JESUS
One night during their honeymoon, Mrs Lee found a large spider in their hotel bath. Calling her husband, she said, “Could you get rid of it? My Mother always took them away for me.” Her six-foot tall husband looking rather sheepish, replied: “So did my Mother.”
Peter asked Mike what they meant by phrenology. Mike said, “They feel the bumps on your head and tell you what kind of man you are.” Peter was quiet for a minute and he then blurted out, “If they examined the bumps on my head, they’d know what kind of wife I have.”