Traumatic Childhood

Dear Goldie 

I had a very traumatic childhood. My parents did not get along and there was always strife. They never affirmed me and said they didn’t believe I would amount to anything. I have very low self image, inferiority complex cant do anything well. I’m always afraid of what people think of me. Do you think things that happened in our past can still impacts us as adults?


Dear Wondering,

child-traumatic-thumbLet me tell you about Tom, whose problem is very similar to yours. We were praying about why he felt as he did when the Holy Spirit brought to his mind about what a teacher did. He realised he had completely forgotten about this incident until we started praying. He was about 10 years old and not able to speak English well. The teacher laughed at what he said, which resulted in the whole class laughing too.

Embarrassed and humiliated he muttered, “I hate you, I hate you”. He decided that he would not open his mouth to say anything again. For the rest of the year, he never participated in any of the class activities.

We helped him to forgive the teacher and ask God for forgiveness for his anger. Then we cut off the bad memory in the Name of Jesus. In forgiving and confessing his own sin, the bitter root was removed and he received cleansing. We then assured him of God’s opinion of him: that he was God’s creation and wonderfully made.

Healing of his wounds was possible when he allowed God to remould and transform his mind. He could then believe that God’s will is good and perfect (Rom 12:2), and that God wants to prosper him, to give him hope and a future (Jer 29:11).

Let me also tell you about Nancy who was afraid to ride a bike, which was her main means of transport. As we prayed to ask God how this fear came about, she recalled an accident in which she was knocked off her bike by a taxi and landed unconscious in the hospital. Her mother warned her not to ride a bike again. Her husband said jokingly that she will never be able to ride, seeing how her bike had been stolen three times.

As we cut off these traumatic incidents in the Name of Jesus, her husband suddenly stood up, put his arm around her and prayed to ask God to forgive him for hurting her albeit unintentionally. He then asked her to forgive him. It was a beautiful moment when she said she forgave him, as well as her mother and the taxi driver, both of whom contributed to her fear. She was all smiles after we cut off the unhappy memories. The next day, she declared she had no more fear and couldn’t wait to get on a bike.

From these two accounts, we can see that what happened in our past – especially the hurt we receive from significant people – can cause wounds which may never heal unless properly dealt with. Paul told the Corinthian Christians that they needed spiritual weapons with divine power to demolish strongholds.

This meant that the lies of the devil, influence of others and our wrong mindsets can only be removed with divine weapons such as prayer, forgiveness, confession and the name of Jesus. Weapons of the world such as arguments, persuasion, and force will not work.

child-traumatic-life-02We need to ask Christ to take our thoughts captive and to make them obedient to Him (2 Cor 10:4-5).

It’s the most powerful and effective method in changing a person’s mindset, will and spirit. Thank God for providing the solution to set us free from our past. end48




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Do you have an issue you need advice on? Write to Dear Goldie at for her godly counsel. Selected questions may be featured in this column. If you leave an email address, you will have your question answered, whether it’s published or not. thanks Asian Beacon for permission to republish this article originally published by Asian Beacon to view the Digital Asian Beacon Magazine click here  | Asian Beacon Digital: PUBLISHED OCTOBER 28, 2013 | Asian Beacon link: Dear Goldie – Traumatic Childhood | Asian Beacon. | Asian Beacon Print: Dear Goldie – Traumatic Childhood – Asian Beacon: Dec 12-Jan 13 (Vol 44, No 6, p42) | Feature image: from article How Childhood Trauma Creates Life-long Adult Addicts | Article images: Obtained via Public Domain Olga Jarman

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